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Bridge Alertness Software Request

I'm looking for a software opponent. Specifically, a program to improve my bridge alertness.

I don't care about expertise. I want the programs to use simple (even rote) bidding and play. I'd rather it make typical novice/intermediate mistakes than weirdness. But I want it's signals to be relatively trustworthy. And, here's the kicker, I want it to also pepper me with a bunch of other questions, like "Say, what spot did your partner play on trick two? Did he echo in spades? What was the opening lead?" I want the program to have a button that says "I know declarer's exact shape" (and maybe another button like, "I strongly suspect it" and I want the program to buzz me if I don't press it when I should have known it.

In short, I want it to hector me so that I count every hand.

Computers learning something like bridge is hard, but computers keeping track of tiny details and quizzing me on them? They were made for that I mean, if it could say "Hey, you had a guaranteed overtrick squeeze based on the known shapes," that would be great as well, but that's a nice bonus. Or if it could point out a no-hope play (based on distribution), but honestly the alertness is enough.

Ideally it would generate random deals and play them. Me and three little old ladies who always signal and follow rote rules. The point isn't for me to decide if I should trust my opponents. A computer can't teach me that. The point is to get me to notice.

Is there any software like that? If not, what are the features for current software that come closest?

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