Our spade length and medium strength hand make it probable that we can buy it in 2♥. We should only go higher than that if we thing we're favorites to make.

2 aces and 2 queens though… Or maybe the ♠J in addition. Not that I know the hand or anything (I didn't know the hand when I wrote my initial comment)

When a decision is close; look for spots and useful jacks. This hand has neither black Jack nor ten. An otherwise excellent slam (with spots) might become just a decent one because we can't handle bad breaks. And Slam might not be good at all if partner needed us to have a working Q.

Also, when it is clear the other side is going to win the contract, you should stick in 1-bids to help direct the defense or clarify important information.

After playing a bunch of hands of Hool with the wife and kids (who do not play bridge) we started moving in a bridge-like direction with agreements about what showing specific distributional information means, which is a step toward understanding bidding.
I told them
1) with a bad hand (fewer than 10 HCP), start by naming a 2 or 3 card suit
2) with 3 suits of 4+" length, start with your singleton or void, then follow with HCP
3) with no singletons or 6-card suits and 14-18 HCP, give your general distribution first
4) With a very strong hand (20+) start by naming your HCP
5) with a good hand (10+) that doesn't qualify for any of the above, start by naming a 4 or 5 card suit, long major first

These generally translate to
1) Pass
2) DBL
3) 1NT
4) 2C/2N
5) 1-suit

As responder, you can have rules too.

I thought it interesting perhaps to see what sort of rules they'd come up with on their own, but my kids were struggling, so I helped.

A psyche must be a gross distortion. 1 HCP and 1 Card is not a gross distortion.

@Jeff, I saw the hand and thought, “It is completely obvious this was meant as a natural bid by the bidder, an attempt to arrive at a making 3NT.”

A little late to this, but a careful look at the map shows the convention center a two block walk from the Square Victoria Metro station. In Montreal, the trains run very frequently, although I'm not sure how late.

When I was a wee little player, my Uncle yelled at my Grandfather who opened 1♠ with 5-5 in the blacks, saying, “The suit order is Clubs - Diamonds - Hearts - Spades - Clubs.”

Of course, he was wrong, but with clubs and spades it is easy and convenient to open longer clubs.

Not a fan of bidding suits out of length order. Would open 1♣.

There are two pairs of things going on:
If 2NT would be natural, then North should bid 3♦ over 3♣ to show both suits.

If 2NT is scrambling, then 3♣ shows 5+ clubs and North should either pass or bid 3♥, but NOT 3♦ (which should now show 5+)

Fortunately, the convention chart is only like 5 sheets of paper, so it wouldn't hurt too much. Although the possibility of a paper cut is live.

Maybe they hooked the spade in 6♣ for a push?

Not a whole lot of blame here.
I don't fancy 1NT on the North cards, so 1♠ it is.

I suppose some folks might make an offshape, low defense negative double with the South hand. I would not.

North doesn't have a palatable action over 3♦; pass is normal.

South could bid 4♣ here, and it probably is right to do so. That is the only decision that I might go the other way on.

So what blame there is goes to South.

So much of bidding is about majors, so on a hand like this, where you each have shortness in the unbid major, it becomes harder to compete.

What is the difference between North bidding 3♣ before 4NT and a direct 4NT? Seems to me the direct 4NT over 2♥ is clearly quantitative (and indicated.)

It seems to me the delayed sequence could easily be misconstrued as spade keycard.

North should hold the 987 of spades for X's, then play the 4-3 fit.

One 2-card holding and one 3-card holding: JT and JT8 (otherwise the 8 would have popped up.) The fact that the 8 is relevant is, unfortunately, relevant.

redacted.

Although this is absolutely not a restricted choice situation, since you blow to three card holdings as well as two card holdings. So unless you have jedi feelings on the matter, I'd go up after the 9 isn't covered.

“Inappropriate” usually = “Too Strong”